Iron Man 3
Dis would have been a great movie if it had been half an hour shorter. And made a lick of sense. Monster can imagine script notes session went someting like dis: Producer: Dis… Continue reading
Dis would have been a great movie if it had been half an hour shorter. And made a lick of sense. Monster can imagine script notes session went someting like dis: Producer: Dis… Continue reading →
Dr. Strange? More like Dr. Creep! Apparently, dis guy not familiar wit de Hypocritical Oath, but he all sorts of familiar wit “doctor-patient confidentiality”…if you know what me mean. No? Well, let monster… Continue reading →
Dis movie remind monster of Snuffleupagus after last year’s Oktoberfest: a big, bloated, confused mess dat hang around way too long after party end. Movie picks up 8 years after last one. Harvey… Continue reading →
What if Deadpool became Green Lantern? Dis seem to be de qwestion dis movie try to answer. Unlike it’s more ambitious predecessors, Green Lantern aspire to be little more den a quasi-entertaining kids… Continue reading →
Watching X-Men: First Class like dating smart, beautiful she-monster who be fantastik company – until she drink too much, start rambling, talk about her ex, linger over espresso, and leave you wishing date… Continue reading →
Do you have low expektations? Are you annoyed by tings like logic and quality? Are you a cretin? If you answered yes to any of dese questions, den you may enjoy The Green… Continue reading →
Monster like to rate sekwels on what me call de Sliding Celebrity Sibling Scale. It start at Clint Howard and go all de way up to Mark Wahlberg. Given how much me enjoy… Continue reading →
Dis film be filled wit violence, torture, and a little girl charakter more potty-mouthed den Grover dat time he developed “chemikal burns” on his blueberries after jacuzzi party wit Madonna. It be a… Continue reading →
Noooooooooooooooo! BIRDSEYE VIEW of monster on knees, head trown back, staring up at de sky in anguish while me scream: Nooooooooooooooooo! DAT pretty much sum up monster’s review of dis movie. Me know,… Continue reading →
Who watches de Watchmen? Well, Monster for one. All 3+ hours of direktor’s cut. It longer den a superbowl halftime show and inklude raspy-voice narration dat, at first, gimme flashback to craptakular Spirit… Continue reading →